Future hopes and dreams…

I have been thinking a lot about this lately. I have some hopes and dreams that I don’t dare to share. I hope for them in secret but I am a coward and ’til this day I have failed to achieve them… Can I leave my safe environment and just trust God and throw myself into His mercy? Do I really dare to?! Isn’t this what it is all about? To trust?! To dare?! To really do?! Everything speaks against it, my economical situation, my age, my brain, my rationality. But my heart longs for it…To blindly go where I believe God wants me…But do I really dare to?…


Managing my time…

So, I’m watching a series called Ask it. It centers around one question; “What is the wise thing for me to do?“. In light of my past experiences, my present situation and my future hopes and dreams, what is the wise thing for me to do?
In part 3, they talk about time. How could I manage my time best?

For the past month I have seen articles, pictures, meme’s and more pointing me towards this. How should I best spend my time? What is important? Looking back when I’m old, what will I regret not to have done? What will I be proud of I did do? What will have the most worth? All these articles, pics and meme’s have said to cherish friendship, family and Jesus.

People who lie on their death bed all regret not spending time with their children, not spending time with their spouse, working too much, being away from home too much, putting way too much worth in material things and putting too much energy in earning money. I guess this is true:

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy,and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven,where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also”
Mathew 6:19-21

Winter isn’t coming…

but spring is hiding and I’m freezing again. Will this ever stop? No, I live in Gothenburg… I wrote yesterday about me wanting to be born in the US or the UK… Today I wish I had been born in Florida or Australia…

So, in two weeks I will sing at a wedding. It’s a couple in my church and it’s the second one for me this year where i’m singing. I will also sing at a wedding in May but I don’t know the couple getting married so I will get paid! They heard me singing the national anthem at a track and field-competition in February and asked my sister if she knew who I was. And I’m booked a second time from the same track and field-organisation to sing the anthem in June!

I see my voice as a gift from God. He gave it to me and I want to honor Him with it. And now, when I get money using it, it’s money directly from Him. He provides for me! I have a job, but it’s only 75% and I only get by, so this is very welcome and a blessing!

I’m really amazed at how God works and how He loves me!


As I have written before, I love the English language. I find it more expressive, more detailed and more accurate. Especially in the christian vocabulary. Words as mercy and grace means two different things but in Swedish we only have one word…”nåd”. When I think about the use of the words I get irritated that I am a Swede. I would have loved to have been born in the US or the UK. Just to have this language as my mother tongue! When I worship, I rather sing the song in English, even though there is a translated version. But the translation is sometimes so bad it hurts inside!

This is one example:

I’m coming back to the heart of worship, and it’s all about You, it’s all about You Jesus.

This means that the writer wants to go back to the basics, to remember what it really means to worship…
This is the Swedish lyrics:

Jag vill tillbaka till hjärtats lovsång, och den handlar om Dig, bara om Dig Jesus.

What it says is: I want to come back to the worship of the heart, and it’s about You, only about You Jesus.

See my point?! There is a big difference! Matt Redman has a story about writing this song and I will let him tell it himself.

Night of worship…

Ja, det blev verkligen en natt. De kickade igång 7.30 pm vilket blir 00.30 svensk tid (vi är 5 h+). Inte så sent som jag hade tänkt mig men det är ju för att USA inte ändrar sin vintertid förrän nästa söndag. Hade väl räknat med att de skulle hålla på längre en en och en halv timma men nu är det slut. Tio låtar, nattvard med en apell av Andy Stanley. Deras lovsångsteam är ju något utöver det vanliga, de har Candi Pearson-Shelton som lovsångsledare! Hon har sjungit bl a You are My King på en av mina cd-skivor; Passion OneDayLive. Hon har en så speciell, klar och vacker röst! Kan inte beskriva den, så underbar. Satte ihop en youtube-spellista och en spotify-spellista med de flesta låtarna från natten, så njut och prisa Gud!!

How I want my heart…

Har sett på en predikoserie på NP igen. Handlade eg om kärlek, sex och dating men man kan ju applicera det på vardagliga situationer och relationer också. Utgår ifrån 1 kor 13, om hur kärleken är. Utdrag från Svenska Folkbibeln, 1 kor 13:4-7:

4 Kärleken är tålig och mild,
kärleken avundas inte,
den skryter inte, 
den är inte uppblåst,
5 den uppför sig inte illa, 
den söker inte sitt,
den brusar inte upp, 
den tillräknar inte det onda.
6 Den gläder sig inte över orättfärdigheten
men har sin glädje i sanningen.
7 Den fördrar allting, 
den tror allting,
den hoppas allting, 
den uthärdar allting.

Det är ofta som jag ser nya betydelser i gamla låtar nuförtiden när jag ser på predikningar etc. Ett ex är Heartbeat of Heaven av Steven Curtis Chapman. Tänkte inte alls på att den utgick ifrån just 1 kor. Men nu ser jag det klart och tydligt:

Loving, joyful, peaceful, patient
Kind and good and full of faith
Self-controlled and gentle
The heart of heaven beats this way.

I know at times this heart of mine beats only for itself
Full of thoughts and dreams, plans and problem
But this hear beating here in me belongs to someone else
He bought it with His life to show His love 

This is my prayer, Lord, today
Let this heart beat away
Heartbeat of heaven, I want you to be my own,
Heartbeat of heaven, I want my life show
The kind of love that comes and goes with the heartbeat of heaven
— Steven Curtis Chapman